Things I hate...

If you ever see me wearing a sweater like this, pregnant or not, please remove my head with a machete. Photo from sugarslam.com

Although television is undeniably fantastic, it is also imperfect. It kills me to say it, but it's true. Here are some things on TV that make me go KOOKOO FOR COCOA PUFFS.

1. Shows that go nowhere. For example, Secret Life of the American Teenager. That show makes me feel like I'm running in slow motion. NOTHING HAPPENS. And, to distract us from how stupid the show is, they just keep making people pregnant. That's the only trick they've got up their sleeve. Literally the entire cast has been, is or will be preggers. Who's next? One of the babies?

Another example: Rubicon. I don't know, my parents watch it, okay? Well, nothing happens in that show either. I still don't know what it's about. People literally just stand there staring off into space for thirty seconds, and then they go get a cup of coffee or something and stare off into space some more. The whole concept just really makes me feel like exploding.

2. Real Housewives of Anywhere. Tell me this: have you ever met a fake housewife? I didn't think so.

3. Pretty Little Liars. Maybe I'm not entitled to make such a definitive statement because I've only watched one episode of this show, but let me tell you, that was one of the most stressful hours of my life. I could literally feel my premature gray hair growing. That one episode gave me waaaayyy too much anxiety.

But enough bad things for one night! No one likes a Negative Nelly.